Before
In the last two decades, the Loomba foundation has collaborated with multiple public personalities, including representatives of the UN, and heads of states to discuss the state of widows and their need for empowerment.
After
In the last two decades, the Loomba foundation has collaborated with numerous prominent personalities, including representatives of the UN and heads of states, to discuss the status of widows and their need for empowerment.
Notes:
Changed 'multiple' to 'numerous' - word choice
Changed 'public' to 'prominent' - word choice
Removed comma after 'UN' . See comma rules in Chicago Manual of Style, 17th Edition.
State vs. Status - word choice
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