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Sentence 8

Before
In a changing environment where the new keywords are cloud, automation, data-led analytics, IoT, and mobility, the solutions expected from IT service providers as well as the nature of their delivery are undergoing a change. 

After
In a business scenario where the buzzwords are cloud, automation, data-led analytics, IoT, and mobility, the solutions expected from IT service providers, as well as the nature of their delivery, are undergoing a change.

Notes: 
  • Changed 'changing environment' to 'business scenario' since it gives context.
  • Keywords are for blogs or SEO; buzzwords are "a word or phrase, often an item of jargon, that is fashionable at a particular time or in a particular context." This was an issue of word choice. 
  • 'as well as the nature of their delivery' is a non- restrictive clause. This means that even if you take the clause out of the sentence, it will still make sense. The rule is that you set off non-restrictive clauses with commas.

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