Sentence Bytes

Before: In such an environment, faced with new problems of data collection and integration, business continuity across an international market, and variances in the maturity of different markets, legacy systems and equipment will not help organisations to stay on the cutting-edge of change in a sustainable manner. After Legacy systems and equipment cannot handle problems of data collection and integration, business continuity across an international market, and variances in the maturity of different markets.  Notes: The 'before' version is too long and convoluted. It results in a dangling modifier.   I've cut out unnecessary verbiage: " to stay on the cutting-edge of change in a sustainable manner." The 'after' version is free from dangling modifiers and is precise.

Before The talented trio -DK, MV, and NM-have been spearheading our PR services in the city and working with two prominent technology companies in India.  After The talented trio—DK, MV, and NM—have been spearheading our PR services in the city and working with two prominent technology companies in India.  Notes: Replaced ordinary dashes with em dashes. Check this link for more information on the use of em dashes.

Before Here’s a throwback picture from the First Union Budget of Independent India. What do you think are going to be the highlights of Union Budget 2018? After #throwback - Here’s a picture from the First Union Budget of Independent India. What do you think are going to be the highlights of Union Budget 2018? Notes: The usage 'throwback picture' is incorrect.  Check this link for guidelines on how to use the word.

Before Only when a company consistently commits to these working truths will it be able to achieve tangible results. After Only when a company fully commits to these working truths, can we demonstrate results.  Notes: The 'before' sentence was too unwieldy. You cannot consistently commit. You commit once. Shortened for brevity and clarity.

Before: This creates a strong spirit of “one team” that pervades EXA’s workforce, irrespective of their projects, location and nationality. After: Collaboration creates a strong spirit of “one team” that pervades EXA’s workforce, irrespective of their projects, location and nationality. Notes: "This" is an unclear antecedent. I have replaced it with the word 'collaboration'.